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Life is at a crossroad. Usually that signifies a choice to be made. Instead I feel I stand in the middle and am looking up at the open empty clear blue sky - a sky without clouds - white or black, without sunlight, without stars and the moon, an absolute blank. And yet I feel soaked in this void. I recall in primary school, we were given assignments about writing autobiographies of inanimate objects. Today I feel like writing from the point of view of a scarecrow but I still wish to call it 'it'. Perhaps that is the only way I can look at myself objectively, if I make myself an inanimate object and get rid of the 'I-ness' and also 'my ego'.
Only, this scarecrow....its not in the field of lush green life and yellow flowers. It's ill placed, in an arid zone. It is in the middle of nowhere from where two roads lead to a far off destination. There is no one to scare, no birds around, no humans, nothing. Just the road and the ground and that sky and that scarecrow. It is there, ready in its costume - designed to scare. But its head, is up in the sky. Its least bothered to scare anyone or anything. There is a solace of just being there. It looks ready for a fight but it is really not interested.
And still, it can feel the pain in standing it that position, in that posture. It can feel the pain in its artificial arms and feet made of hay as I can feel in my arms and legs right now after a long day. The body is tired and wants to float in mid air. But the mind, yes, this scarecrow seems to have one, is elsewhere. It is looking up at that beautiful clear sky. It doesn't have to choose. It doesn't have to succumb to the odd circumstances of its placement.
The choice is of not having to make a choice and still choose a path just by looking up and away from both the roads.And still, strangely such peaceful and strange thoughts are keeping me up at this odd hour of complete and utter silence. There is no mystery, there is no desire, there is no hope, there is no angst, there are no expectations, there are no disappointments, but there just is this silence and a clear blue open empty ever extending sky and not just its promise with life being at a standstill.
Only, this scarecrow....its not in the field of lush green life and yellow flowers. It's ill placed, in an arid zone. It is in the middle of nowhere from where two roads lead to a far off destination. There is no one to scare, no birds around, no humans, nothing. Just the road and the ground and that sky and that scarecrow. It is there, ready in its costume - designed to scare. But its head, is up in the sky. Its least bothered to scare anyone or anything. There is a solace of just being there. It looks ready for a fight but it is really not interested.
And still, it can feel the pain in standing it that position, in that posture. It can feel the pain in its artificial arms and feet made of hay as I can feel in my arms and legs right now after a long day. The body is tired and wants to float in mid air. But the mind, yes, this scarecrow seems to have one, is elsewhere. It is looking up at that beautiful clear sky. It doesn't have to choose. It doesn't have to succumb to the odd circumstances of its placement.
The choice is of not having to make a choice and still choose a path just by looking up and away from both the roads.And still, strangely such peaceful and strange thoughts are keeping me up at this odd hour of complete and utter silence. There is no mystery, there is no desire, there is no hope, there is no angst, there are no expectations, there are no disappointments, but there just is this silence and a clear blue open empty ever extending sky and not just its promise with life being at a standstill.
